Every Night Live!: Many Emotions

This weekend had many emotions in it. My brother Ryan and his family were coming home from Arizona, a birthday party, fun family time, and something I have dreaded for awhile now but knew it needed to be done putting my mom into a “home”.

Jared, I and the boys headed home Friday night to mom and dad’s and just hung out most of the time. Saturday morning while everyone was gone my mom and I were sitting there playing with the boys and I told her what the plan was in a way that I thought my mom would take best. I asked her how she would feel about going somewhere so she wasn’t alone all day while dad was gone? She said well I don’t like to be alone (my thoughts phew that wasn’t as bad as I thought but we will see). I said I know you don’t and this place where you go there will always be someone around and activities to do and they will take you places. She said well we could try it…(phew again) I said ya we can just try it and see how it goes. Then I told her that we would be getting things ready for her new place and packing her clothes and such, she said ok. Then we went on playing with the boys and about our day. Alison and I started getting her clothes together and things around the house to take to her new place. Kristy and Levi had went to the store before hand to get bedding, curtains, towels, and other things she needed. While we were getting her clothes ready she came in the room so I just had her start trying on clothes and seeing what still fit and such. (This was not too much out of the norm from back in the day as mom and I would do this often). Then Mike, Levi, Steve, Kristy, Alison, Wyatt and myself went to her new home and decorated her room. She was going to be going to the Windsor Manor in Algona, which is an assisted living with a memory care unit. This place is new just opened in June 1 and you got to decorate your own room and bring things in that were “hers” which was nice. We brought old pictures of us kids and some new ones but the old ones is what she remembers most! (Many may wonder but yes she still remembers all us kids and most of the grandkids most of the time). We went on a tour (Mike, Alison, myself) with Scott the Manager of the place and saw the Memory care unit and such which is going to be so nice, but I had a moment and broke down in tears just the thought of it all, I had been trying to be so strong. She is in the Assisted Living part right now because there is no other patients in the Memory care unit so she just has someone on her24/7 until she goes to bed and then they check on her and have an alarm on her door so if she wakes up and goes out of her room they will know. Once they get more patients back in Memory Care she will move back there where it is a locked unit, only 10 rooms and always has a caregiver of some sort in there. Then that night we went to church and to Johney’s to eat.

LOVE these all these guys more then words!!

Gonna miss swinging with my mom

Sunday was the day Ryan and his family got there and the birthday party. So we tried to enjoy the day with all of us family there for the last time as a family “at home”. (We can still take mom out of the home but we are not sure how the transition will go so we will see on that). We grilled out, played bags, and kids played in the dirt for hours. It was so nice to just hang out catch up and watch all the cousins play together. They all played so NICE and got along, we hardly knew they were there. Being around family is so much fun and since my family is far away and we were going through a tough time as a family it was so good to hang out and just be “us” again.

Tristan

Landon

Logan so good with the little kids... LOVE THAT!

grandkids missing a few

FAMILY!!!

too sweet cousin Stella and Gracie swinging in Grandma's swing

sisters

The ladies even played bags

Logan loving his cousins up!

the LADIES!! Love these girls so much

Birthday girl Stella wants her cake

two love birds enjoying cake

enjoying some cake adn ice cream

LOVE this funny, caring, loving, soft hearted man more then anything

Boys love to wrestle

Logan being silly with cousin Walker

Of course we got the bags out...Jared loves this game

Monday was the day (we as a family were not looking forward to) we would put our mother, our sweet, caring, loving mother and wife into a home to get better care. So as I got my mom ready (which I always did every day when I was home), got her showered make up on and hair done I told her again where she was going and such and her response, well we can try it. So far so good as far as mom-taking going into a home goes. She always told dad and I don’t put me “away” please don’t put me away, so you can imagine the guilt we felt as this day came upon us. Dad asked if we could all go together and I said sure, Levi and Mike were already in town so mom, dad, Steve, Ryan and myself got ready to leave. I got them all in the car and had to turn back to the house and RUN in as I lost it, again trying to be so strong so mom didn’t see and ask what was the matter. Danielle was there holding Stella so I hugged her so tight I prolly broke her! I went into the bathroom and had to gather myself before getting back into the car. Mom had her bear (kid), she carries around dolls, stuffed bear, stuffed dog and thinks they are her grandkids, refers to herself as grandma. So those went along and things were pretty good as she hung onto it. This is something that is a good ting for Alzheimer’s patients so as we learned this we went with it and took them with her. As we drove there with not a whole lot of talking and dad crying we arrive there. We get out and mom say’s I remember this place and talks about how nice it is how much they have done to it. Now we don’t know if she really remembers it at all or just saying that but dad did take here there awhile back. Then we walk in and meet Lisa and she walks us back to her room and she says lets see what you remember, mom walks in and sits down in the recliner and we all start talking. Then we had to do some paper work so they started on that and mom got up. I asked where she was going and she said bathroom and then I took her to the bathroom and Mike walked in after she was down and he said, this is real nice Ma and she said I know they have done it so nice! That warmed my heart so much that she was adjusting ok with it thus far. So then Mike, Steve, mom and I went on a walk around the place looked at the Memory care unit talked to some ladies and looked at the birds. Then we headed back to her room and I helped dad with some questions as my brothers ordered pizza. Then we were done and the ladies said “Judy are you ready for dinner” and she said sure. So we all started walking to the front and dad turns to me and said I need to go… I said it is fine just keep walking it will be ok and he said no its not going to be(he was getting nervous). We all stopped to talk to Scott and then I gave mom a couple hugs(my dad kept walking) and I said mom I love you and the lady took her to dinner(lunch). As she walked in front of us we followed her and then we got to front and I LOST it!!! I went to Levi and needed a hug then made my brother cry. It was one of the hardest things I have ever done was see my mom walk away from me know what was in store. I cried hard for awhile and then gathered myself and we talked a bit more. Watched mom eat and she was getting a long just fine so made things seem better and it was going to work out good there. So we left went back to the house had some pizza and as it was hard not having mom there and to be honest a bit weird it is all for the better especially for my dad and my mom’s care. We hung out for a bit kids napped, then went to the pool with Ryan, Danielle, Caden, Mabel, Stella, Alison, Wyatt, Weston, Walker and us. We had a good time playing in the pool with all the cousins. Then we went back to mom and dad's and had dinner and then headed back to Sioux City late. Leaving was a bit tough. Leaving dad was hard, when I went to leave, he started crying and then of course I did. I told him I would him I would be here for him and that it was going to be ok and was better but would just take some getting used to. We got back late but I wanted to hang out with dad for awhile.